Fuck you. That’s right, assholes – fuck you. Do you know how many other desperate horny assholes besides yourself visit this site on a daily basis? Six to eight thousand. Yet how many of you have the goddamn decency to sign up for a subscription to Nature Girls or one of the other fine sites advertised here, such as Femjoy, MPL Studios, and MET-Art? Zero, on 9 days out of 10. Fucking zero. Goddamn freeloading cheapskates. You miserly tightwads suck up my bandwidth and jerk off at my expense without giving me so much as one red cent. Assholes. You want your fucking porn for free, your fucking music, your fucking movies, your fucking software, fucking everything, for fucking free. Well fuck you, you goddamn commies. I’m not going to put up with it anymore.

You think running a porn site is all wine and roses, just one big fucking nonstop party of looking at beautiful naked women all fucking day? Well you’re fucking wrong. Running a porn site takes a significant amount of time, effort and money. Models don’t pose for free, hosting and bandwidth aren’t free, and time is fucking money. If you think I’m going to continue to pour my blood, sweat and tears into this fucking website just so you pathetic virginal geeks and losers can jerk off in your parents’ basement on a Saturday night, you’re sadly fucking mistaken. And it’s no wonder you don’t have real girlfriends to fuck, you’re so goddamn cheap you’d probably refuse to pay for dinner even if by some miracle you did manage to score a date.

You remember that Soup Nazi from Seinfeld? Well, from now on I’m going to be the Porn Nazi. No more updates to this site from now on. No more free sample galleries for you to jerk off to. Nada. I’m not going to lift one fucking pinkie to work on this site – until and unless one of you bastards manages to loosen your anal sphincter of a wallet and pony up a measly 20-30 bucks to actually pay for some fucking quality porn. That’s right, only 1 of you 6000+ daily visitors needs to make a donation. Is that so fucking much to ask? Think of it as the PBS of Porn. Every time I make a sale, I’ll add some more photos of hot naked girls. But if a week or more goes by with nothing to show for it, maybe I’ll post goatse.cx or “2 Girls 1 Cup” randomly throughout the site, just for grins and giggles, just for the fuck of it – that ought to put a quick fucking end to your marathon masturbation session, shouldn’t it?

What’s that you say? The customer is always right? Well you’re not my fucking customer until you give me some of your goddamn money. What’s that again? You’ll just visit some other porn site to leech off of? Well, that’s just fucking fine by me. Good bye and good fucking riddance – let some other chump webmaster slave away for nothing so you can shoot your load. You’re not doing me any goddamn good anyway.

Oh, and one more thing – happy fucking April Fools Day. Assholes.